These days, young parents have tons of information about raising kids. There are books, websites, and experts offering advice on every little thing. They can even get consultations from specialists whenever they need. But our own parents didn’t have all that. They raised us based on what they knew and what they learned from their own parents. So sometimes, the way we were brought up can seem really different from what we’re told is best now.
1. Early marriage and parenthood go without saying.
In earlier generations, there was often pressure on young adults to marry and start a family at a relatively young age, and to have more than one child a couple of years after the start of the family. Today, there is more emphasis on personal and career development before settling down. And moreover some researches show that early marriage can lead to some family problems, like dissatisfaction with married life, experience of having lots of responsibility, lack of independence in family life.
2. A college education is an indicator of your status.
«You can’t find a good job without going to college!» Many people must have heard this when they were teenagers. And lots of us believed this, but now don’t even know where our college diploma is. More than 41% of people that finished college have jobs that don’t require this kind of education. Today, employers are more interested in the practical skills of their employees rather than their qualifications.
When you finish school, it may be wise to take a gap year to understand what you really want to do and decide if you actually need a college education.
3. Classes are good for kids’ development — the more, the better!
A very tight schedule can exhaust children, which is obviously not good at all.
Famous American teacher Douglas Haddad recommends that parents slow down and give their children time to discover their own talents, and then decide if they need additional forms of education.
4. Being plump is healthy.
Children that always finished their meals were praised, and being plump was believed to be healthy. But bad eating habits formed in childhood often result in weight problems and eating disorders.
5. Money can’t buy happiness.
We wish this were true, but life says otherwise: money can make you happier, no matter what other people say.
Parents should teach their children the basics of budgeting. This will help kids form the right habits in money management and reach financial success in their adult lives.
6. Not standing out from the crowd means being good.
Traditional parenting often enforced strict dress codes and grooming expectations, particularly regarding modesty and conformity to societal norms. This might puzzle us today as modern parenting encourages children to express themselves through their clothing, appearance and let them express their emotions fully.
7. Older children are responsible for younger ones.
Very often, older children had to spend a lot of time taking care of younger ones. Parents had to work a lot and there was no other choice. But older kids had to sacrifice their time with friends and hobbies for the needs of their younger siblings.
Psychologists say that sometimes when kids have to perform the duties of parents, it may lead to psychological problems: they might not want to have their own children.
8. Women are housewives and men are breadwinners.
In recent decades, gender roles are not as important anymore. Women today can build successful careers and men can go on paternity leave and manage things around the house.
9. There’s nothing more shameful for a woman than having children without a husband.
Wrong, again. Today, there’s nothing surprising about single mothers and they’re not frowned upon as they were 30 years ago. Very often, having a child without a husband is an informed decision made by a woman. More than that, in the past 30 years, the number of single fathers has increased 1.5 times.
10. Storks deliver babies.
Some topics were never discussed — like when kids asked where babies came from, parents often said that they were delivered by a stork. Because of this, young people would often get into their first relationship without any knowledge of their bodies. They only based things off of the advice they received from their friends and bits of information from books and films. All these experiences could lead to bad consequences, including problems with both physical and mental health.
11. Children should be seen and not heard.
In the past, children were often expected to remain quiet and obedient in the presence of adults. Modern parenting emphasizes the importance of children expressing themselves and their opinions, because self-expression is a vital component of a young individual’s growth. The development of self-esteem and confidence in children is frequently nurtured by their capacity to express their feelings with clarity and authenticity.
Every parent has their own way of raising children. Just like how every family has its own special traditions, parents have rules they think are best for their kids. Sometimes, famous people, like celebrities, also share their ideas about parenting. They might talk about what works for them and their families. But in the end, each parent decides what’s right for their own children, based on love and what they believe is best.
My 14-Year-Old Daughter Found a Pacifier in My Husband’s Briefcase — the Shocking Truth Almost Destroyed Me
“Tell you what, sweetie?” I replied, puzzled.
She revealed a baby’s pacifier and exclaimed, “That I’m going to be a big sister!”
Her words stunned me. Since Laura’s birth, more children had become an impossibility for us. The presence of a pacifier in Henry’s briefcase, where Laura had found it earlier that day, churned a storm of confusion and worry inside me.
As the evening quieted down, my mind raced with unanswered questions and fears. I knew I couldn’t just let it go. The next morning, after Henry left for work, I tiptoed into his study. My hands trembled slightly as I placed the pacifier exactly where Laura had found it.
I was determined to uncover the truth behind this unsettling discovery without alarming Henry. Something was amiss, and I needed to find out what it was, not just for my peace of mind but for the sake of our family.
The morning sun had barely risen when I started following Henry’s car from a distance. My heart pounded with a mix of fear and determination as I watched him drive. Normally, he would head straight to his office downtown. But today, he took a different route. My grip tightened on the steering wheel as his car turned into a less familiar part of town.
After about thirty minutes, Henry pulled into the parking lot of a quaint little coffee shop on the outskirts of our city. It looked like a place hidden away from the usual rush, where secrets could be whispered without fear of being overheard. I parked a few cars away and watched as he stepped out, his movements relaxed and unhurried.
My breath caught when I saw a woman approaching him. She was about my age, with a gentle smile. They greeted each other not like strangers, but with a familiarity that sent a chill down my spine. They hugged—a long, comfortable hug that you’d only share with someone you truly cared about.
I felt a sting of betrayal as I watched them sit down at a table outside the coffee shop. They ordered coffee, laughing and chatting with an ease that made my stomach turn. Who was she? Why had Henry never mentioned her? Every cheerful gesture, every shared laugh seemed to amplify my fears and suspicions.
I couldn’t just sit there and watch any longer. My mind was racing with dark thoughts, and I needed answers. I gathered all my courage, stepped out of my car, and walked towards them. With each step, my heart felt heavier. I dreaded the confrontation that was about to unfold but desperate to uncover the truth behind this mysterious meeting.
As I approached Henry and the woman, my feet felt like they were made of lead, each step heavier than the last. Reaching their table, my voice came out sharper than I intended, fueled by a mix of hurt and suspicion.
“Henry,” I called out, ignoring the woman at first. “What is going on here? Who is she?”
Henry looked up, clearly startled by my sudden appearance. The woman turned towards me, her expression a blend of surprise and concern.
“Jen, this is Emma,” Henry said, his voice calm but serious. “She’s… she’s my sister.”
“Sister?” I echoed, my confusion growing. “What are you talking about? You never mentioned you had a sister!”
Henry sighed, a deep, weary sound that seemed to carry more stories than I could have imagined. “I didn’t know until a few weeks ago,” he explained. “After our father passed away, Emma found some old letters he had written. It turns out he had another family before us, and Emma is my half-sister. She reached out to me, wanting to connect.”
Emma, the woman I had mistaken for a threat, offered me a tentative smile. “I didn’t mean to cause any trouble,” she said softly. “I just wanted to know my brother.”
As the initial shock began to fade, we decided to move to a more private corner of the coffee shop. There, Emma shared her story. She told us about being raised by her mother, who had a brief relationship with their father. It was only after he had passed that she discovered letters and other mementos he had left behind, including a baby’s pacifier.
Emma explained that the pacifier was a keepsake from her own infancy. Their father had held onto it. Henry had brought it home, thinking to discuss the possibility of trying for another child with me or perhaps adopting.
Hearing Emma’s story my heart began to soften. I understood the innocence of her intentions and the coincidence of the pacifier. The tension that had built up slowly dissipated. It was replaced by an emerging sense of empathy and curiosity about this new member of our extended family. The day that started with suspicion and dread was turning into a moment of unexpected bonding. It opened the door to new family ties and healing old wounds.
After our conversation at the coffee shop, Henry, Emma, and I decided to continue our discussion in a quieter, more private setting back at our home. As we sat in our living room, the light filtering in through the windows seemed to ease the earlier tension. We talked openly about everything that had transpired, delving into our feelings and the surprising turns our lives had taken.
Henry and I took a moment to reconnect, acknowledging the gap that had formed in our communication. “I should have told you about Emma the moment I found out,” Henry admitted, taking my hand. “I was just trying to figure it all out myself.”
“I understand,” I replied, squeezing his hand back. “But let’s promise to keep no more secrets from each other, no matter what.”
“Agreed,” he nodded, and we both smiled, a weight lifting from our shoulders. We turned to Emma, who had been watching us with a hopeful look. “Welcome to the family,” I told her, and we embraced, sealing our new bond.
A few months later, we gathered to celebrate Emma’s birthday. Our home buzzed with laughter and chatter, a stark contrast to the quiet tension of our first meeting. Laura, who had eagerly taken on her role as a niece, flitted around, helping set up decorations and making sure Emma felt special.
Laura and Emma bonded quickly, laughing and sharing stories. I felt a profound sense of gratitude for the unexpected twists that had brought us closer. Our family had grown not just in numbers but in understanding and love, embracing both the past and the potential for our future together.
This work is inspired by real events and people, but it has been fictionalized for creative purposes. Names, characters, and details have been changed to protect privacy and enhance the narrative. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, or actual events is purely coincidental and not intended by the author.
The author and publisher make no claims to the accuracy of events or the portrayal of characters and are not liable for any misinterpretation. This story is provided “as is,” and any opinions expressed are those of the characters and do not reflect the views of the author or publisher.
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