Larry, our clipboard-wielding HOA dictator, had no idea who he was messing with when he fined me for my lawn being half an inch too long. I decided to give him something to really look at, a lawn so outrageous, yet so perfectly within the rules, that he’d regret ever starting this fight.
For decades, my neighborhood was the kind of place where you could sip tea on your porch in peace, wave to the neighbors, and not worry about a thing.
Then Larry got his grubby hands on the HOA presidency.
Oh, Larry. You know the type: mid-50s, born in a pressed polo shirt, thinks the world revolves around his clipboard. From the moment he took office, it was like someone handed him the keys to a kingdom.
Or at least, that’s what he thought.
Now, I’ve been living here for twenty-five years. Raised three kids in this house. Buried a husband too. And you know what I’d learned?
Don’t mess with a woman who’s survived kids and a man who thought barbeque sauce was a vegetable. Larry clearly didn’t get that memo.
Ever since I skipped his precious HOA meeting last summer, he’s been out for blood. Like I needed to hear two hours of droning on about fence heights and paint colors. I had more important things to do — like watching my begonias bloom.
It all started last week.
I was out on the porch, minding my business, when I spotted Larry marching up the driveway, clipboard in hand.
“Oh, here we go,” I muttered, already feeling my blood pressure spike.
He stopped right at the foot of the steps, and didn’t even bother with a hello.
“Mrs. Pearson,” he began, his voice dripping with condescension. “I’m afraid you’ve violated the HOA’s lawn maintenance standards.”
I blinked at him, trying to keep my temper in check. “Is that so? The lawn’s been freshly mowed. Just did it two days ago.”
“Well,” he said, clicking his pen like he was about to write me up for a felony, “it’s half an inch too long. HOA standards are very clear about this.”
I stared at him. Half. An. Inch. “You’ve got to be kidding me.”
His smug little grin told me otherwise.
“We have standards here, Mrs. Pearson. If we let one person get away with neglecting their lawn, what kind of message does that send?”
Oh, I could’ve throttled him right there. But I didn’t. Instead, I just smiled sweetly and said, “Thanks for the heads-up, Larry. I’ll be sure to trim that extra half-inch for you.”
Inside, though? I was fuming. Who did this guy think he was? Half an inch?
I’ve survived diaper blowouts, PTA meetings, and a husband who once tried to roast marshmallows using a propane torch. I wasn’t about to let Larry the Clipboard King push me around.
That night, I sat in my armchair, stewing over the whole thing. I thought about all the times in my life I’d been told to “follow the rules,” and how I’d managed to bend them just enough to keep my sanity.
If Larry wanted to play hardball, fine. Two could play that game.
And then it hit me: the HOA rulebook. That stupid, dusty old thing Larry was always quoting. I hadn’t bothered with it much over the years, but now it was time to get acquainted.
I flipped through it for a good hour, and there it was. Clear as day. Lawn decorations, tasteful, of course, were completely allowed, as long as they stayed within certain size and placement guidelines.
Oh, Larry. You poor, unfortunate soul. You had no idea what you’d just unleashed.
The very next morning, I went on the shopping spree of a lifetime. It was glorious. I bought gnomes. Not just any gnomes, though, giant ones. One was holding a lantern, another was fishing in a little fake pond I set up in the garden.
And an entire flock of pink, plastic flamingos. I clustered them together like they were planning some sort of tropical rebellion.
Then came the solar lights. I lined the walkway, the garden, and even hung a few in the trees. By the time I was done, my yard looked like a cross between a fairy tale and a Florida souvenir shop.
And the best part? Every single piece was perfectly HOA-compliant. Not a single rule was broken. I leaned back in my lawn chair, watching the sun set behind my masterpiece.
The twinkling lights came to life, casting a warm glow over my gnome army and the flamingo brigade. It was, in a word, glorious.
But Larry, oh Larry, was not going to take this lying down.
The first time he saw my yard, I knew I had him. I was watering the petunias when I spotted his car creeping down the street. His windows rolled down, his eyes narrowing as they scanned every inch of my lawn.
The way his jaw clenched, his fingers tight on the steering wheel — it was priceless. He slowed to a crawl, staring at the gnome with the margarita, lounging in his lawn chair like he didn’t have a care in the world.
I gave Larry a little wave, extra sweet, as if I didn’t know I’d just declared war.
He stared at me, his face turning the color of a sunburned tomato, and then, without a word, he sped off.
I let out a laugh so loud it startled a squirrel in the oak tree. “That’s right, Larry. You can’t touch this.”
For a few days, I thought maybe, just maybe, he’d let it go. Silly me. A week later, there he was again, stomping up to my door with that clipboard, wearing his HOA President badge like he’d been knighted.
“Mrs. Pearson,” he began, not even bothering with pleasantries, “I’ve come to inform you that your mailbox violates HOA standards.”
I blinked at him. “The mailbox?” I tilted my head toward it. “Larry, I just painted that thing two months ago. It’s pristine.”
He squinted at it like he’d found some imaginary flaw. “The paint is chipping,” he insisted, scribbling something on his clipboard.
I glanced at the mailbox again. Not a chip in sight. But I knew this wasn’t about the mailbox. This was personal.
“You’ve got a lot of nerve,” I muttered, crossing my arms. “All this over half an inch of grass?”
“I’m just enforcing the rules,” Larry said, but the look in his eyes told a different story.
I narrowed my eyes at him. “Sure, Larry. Whatever helps you sleep at night.”
He turned on his heel and strutted back to his car like he’d just delivered some life-altering decree. I watched him go, fury bubbling up inside me. Oh, he thought he could win this? Fine. Let the games begin.
That night, I hatched a plan. If Larry wanted a fight, he was going to get one. I spent the next morning back at the garden store, loading up on more gnomes, more flamingos, and just for fun, a motion-activated sprinkler system.
By the time I was done, my yard looked like a carnival of absurdity. Gnomes of all sizes stood proudly in formation, some fishing, some holding tiny shovels, and one, my new favorite, lounging in a hammock with a miniature beer in hand.
The flamingos? They’d formed their own pink plastic army, marching across the lawn with solar lights guiding their way.
But the pièce de résistance? The sprinkler system. Every time Larry came by to inspect my yard, the motion sensor would activate, spraying water in every direction. Totally by accident, of course.
The first time it happened, I nearly fell off the porch laughing.
Larry pulled up, clipboard ready, only to be met with a stream of water straight to the face. He spluttered, waving his arms like a drowning cat, and retreated to his car, soaked to the bone.
The look of pure outrage on his face was worth every penny I’d spent.
But the best part? The neighbors started to notice.
One by one, they began stopping by to compliment my “creative flair.”
Mrs. Johnson from three houses down said she loved the “whimsical” atmosphere. Mr. Thompson chuckled, saying he hadn’t seen Larry so flustered in years. And soon, it wasn’t just compliments. The neighbors started putting up their own lawn decorations.
It began with a few garden gnomes, but soon, flamingos popped up all over the cul-de-sac, twinkling lights appeared in every yard, and someone even set up a miniature windmill.
Larry couldn’t keep up.
His clipboard became a joke. The once-feared fines became a badge of honor among the residents, and the more he tried to tighten his grip, the more the neighborhood slipped through his fingers.
Every day, Larry had to drive past our gnomes, our flamingos, and our lights, knowing full well that we’d beaten him at his own game.
And me? I watched the chaos unfold with a smile on my face.
The whole neighborhood had come together, united by lawn ornaments and sheer spite. And Larry, poor Larry, was left powerless, just a man with a soggy clipboard and no authority to back it up.
So, Larry, if you’re reading this, keep on looking. I’ve got plenty more ideas where these came from.
Joyce DeWitt Finally Admits the Truth We All Suspected – You Won’t Believe What She Said
It’s been years since *Three’s Company* was on TV, but the laughs it brought us are still fresh in our minds.
With its memorable characters and hilarious mix-ups, this classic show changed the world of sitcoms forever. Now, Joyce DeWitt shares what truly made *Three’s Company* a show we’ll never forget…
From the funny adventures of three single roommates to the unforgettable acting of John Ritter and Suzanne Somers, *Three’s Company* is still a favorite on American TV. It’s hard to believe that 40 years have passed since the final episode aired on ABC, yet the show’s charm and humor continue to entertain us.
To show just how long it’s been, I recently watched the intro. The scenes at Santa Monica Pier remind me of how much has changed since the show was filmed.
Sadly, both John Ritter and Suzanne Somers have passed away, leaving us far too soon. But Joyce DeWitt, now 75, keeps the spirit of *Three’s Company* alive by sharing her stories and memories of the beloved show.
“The most dear, precious, tender – and utterly unexpected – experiences that have come from working in *Three’s Company* are the many, many adults who have told me that *Three’s Company* was a safe haven they could count on during their teen years – for some, the only safe haven,” Joyce DeWitt told *US Weekly*.
Playing Janet Wood alongside John Ritter and Suzanne Somers, Joyce DeWitt became a TV star and brought joy to millions of viewers.
She appeared in 171 episodes of *Three’s Company* from 1976 to 1984.
“It was such a gift. I mean, it was iconic. But who would have thought it?” Joyce DeWitt told *The Spec*. “All we wanted to do was make people laugh. When I think about it, the show was really like a modern version of a 16th-century comedy. It was all about crazy fun. We talked about serious issues sometimes, but that was always in the background.”
“John Ritter used to say, ‘We don’t want people to just laugh but to fall over their couch laughing,’” she added. “But in the end, it was about the deep friendship and love the characters had for each other. That’s what made people love them.”
After *Three’s Company* ended, Joyce DeWitt took a break from the spotlight for over ten years before returning to acting.
No matter what she has done or plans to do in the future, most people will always remember her for that iconic show. And according to DeWitt, there’s a simple reason for this.
“It was a ‘time out’ from the tough, stressful situations young people were dealing with in their lives,” DeWitt explains, adding:
“And, of course, they say the characters did silly, crazy things that made them laugh. But it was the love, trust, and support between the characters that made fans stay with the show for life.”
In unedited photos from the *Three’s Company* set, the close bond between the cast is clear, especially in the pictures of Joyce DeWitt and Suzanne Somers, who played the much-loved Chrissy Snow.
Both actresses gave memorable performances, portraying young women making their way in a male-dominated world. Their contributions were just as important to the show’s success as John Ritter’s, and in those early days, their smiles in the photos show a sense of friendship and teamwork.
But beneath the laughter, tensions were brewing. While Somers was praised for her role as “the dumbest blonde in America,” her push for equal pay led to growing conflicts. She demanded a 500% salary increase, from $30,000 to $150,000, which put a strain on her relationship with DeWitt. What was once a joyful set became a place of tension and disagreements.
Suzanne Somers always saw *Three’s Company* as a serious business and took her role as an actor very seriously, but she knew this approach bothered her co-stars.
Eventually, Somers was fired but still had to finish the fifth season under strange conditions. She was kept apart from the cast, filming her scenes through odd phone calls while escorted by security. The tension grew, leading to a painful break between Somers and Joyce DeWitt.
For over 30 years, they didn’t speak, a long silence that felt difficult to understand when you looked back at their early friendship on the show.
“They painted me as if I was trying to ruin the show,” Suzanne Somers said in 2020. “So, I never talked to anyone on that show ever again. Ever again.”
Some people thought that Joyce DeWitt’s rivalry played a role in Somers’ departure, but it was really the salary negotiations that caused the rift between them.
Their different situations made things more complicated — Somers was a single mother who needed financial security, while DeWitt was more focused on her acting. This added to the strain on their relationship.
“We had very different approaches to our careers,” Joyce DeWitt said about her relationship with Suzanne Somers after the show. “We had very different needs. I didn’t have a child to support on my own. I didn’t have a business mindset, so I didn’t understand someone who did.”
But in a wonderful turn of events, the two finally reunited in February 2012 on Somers’ talk show, *Breaking Through*. It was clear they had made peace.
The former co-stars shared a heartfelt hug, and their open conversation about the past showed signs of healing.
DeWitt expressed her deep admiration for Somers, saying, “You went up against ruthlessness, and it came down, but what you’ve gone on to do is immeasurable.” This touching moment highlighted the strength of their journey and the power of forgiveness. The two actresses remained friends until Somers’s sad passing in 2023.
In an interview with *US Weekly*, Joyce DeWitt spoke warmly about her late co-stars, honoring the lasting impact they made. Reflecting on Suzanne Somers, who passed away from breast cancer, DeWitt described her as “absolutely wonderful.”
She also paid tribute to John Ritter, who died in 2003 during heart surgery, calling him “a true gift.”
Looking back at the photos from *Three’s Company*, we are reminded of a different, happier time—one filled with laughter, friendship, and unforgettable memories. These images not only capture the joy the cast brought to TV screens but also highlight the lasting legacy they have left behind.
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