Jane’s employers planned a lavish vacation and invited her along to care for their children, promising to cover all expenses. However, upon returning home, they unexpectedly demanded that she pay back the $1,000 for her plane ticket. Jane was taken aback but refused to accept this situation.
One day, Mrs. Smith called Jane into the living room. While tidying up the playroom, Jane felt uneasy about the request. Mrs. Smith, composed and stylish, informed Jane they needed to discuss the vacation expenses. Jane acknowledged the lovely trip but was shocked when Mrs. Smith demanded repayment for the tickets. She couldn’t believe her ears when Mrs. Smith insisted she pay back the money they had initially said would be covered.
Overwhelmed, Jane explained that she couldn’t afford it, as most of her salary went toward rent and her mother’s medical needs. Mr. Smith, uninterested in her situation, confirmed that Jane had one week to pay or the amount would be deducted from her wages.
That evening, Jane was furious. She realized the Smiths valued their reputation more than anything else and decided to use that against them. She created a fake email account and wrote a polite message detailing her experience, leaving enough clues to point back to the Smiths. She sent the email to influential people in their social circle.
Soon, rumors began to spread, damaging the Smiths’ reputation. Jane overheard Mrs. Smith discussing the situation, revealing her distress. At the school pick-up, other nannies asked Jane if the gossip was true, and she confirmed that the Smiths were indeed unkind.
Days later, Mrs. Smith hosted a ladies’ luncheon. Jane attended, knowing it was an opportunity to share more about Mrs. Smith’s behavior. While mingling, she complimented Mrs. Smith’s handbag, hinting at her tendency to borrow and never return items. This sparked more whispers among the guests.
The next day, Mrs. Smith’s friends began demanding their belongings back. Upset, Mrs. Smith confronted Jane during dinner, suspecting her involvement in the email. When Mr. Smith questioned her directly, Jane remained silent, leading to her dismissal.
After moving back home, Jane received a call from Mrs. Johnson, who had heard about her situation and offered her a job with better pay and conditions. Grateful and relieved, Jane accepted the offer. She hoped the Smiths felt the sting of betrayal for their treatment of her.
Why More Happy Couples Prefer to Sleep in Separate Beds
According to a survey, only 14% of couples sleep in separate beds every night. And while many of us might believe in the saying “couples who sleep apart grow apart” there are studies that show the opposite is actually true.
We at Bright Side believe that there are no wrong or right sleep arrangements, because to some, sleeping in different beds can be as pleasing as for others sharing a bed with their partner.
A poor night’s sleep can turn lovers into fighters.
According to research, sharing a bed with a partner that has restless sleep behavior can deprive you of 49 minutes of sleep each night. And, when one partner doesn’t get a proper night’s sleep because of the other, it will most likely result in a conflict between them the next day.
Actually, the study even confirmed that couples who tend to have a poor night’s sleep have more severe and more frequent fights than those who wake up well-rested. People who get a good night’s sleep, on the other hand, are more likely to be in a good mood, have lower stress levels, and be more patient.
Resenting your partner because you can’t get a good night’s sleep can be destructive to the relationship.
Snoring, fidgeting, and bed or blanket hogging are just a few of many reasons why some couples choose to sleep in different beds or even in different bedrooms. Lying awake listening to your partner snoring while you beat yourself up to fall asleep can lead to a build-up of anger, tension, and resentment toward your partner.
According to Jennifer Adams, author of Sleeping Apart Not Falling Apart, sleeping in a separate bedroom can even help a relationship thrive because both partners are not sleep deprived.
Each partner can tailor their sleeping conditions to their heart’s content.
Tina Cooper, a licensed social worker, sleeps in different bedrooms with her partner because of their opposite sleeping habits. “I’m a night owl, he’s an early bird. I need soothing sounds to fall asleep, and he likes silence. He likes a hard mattress, and I like soft and full of pillows. And because I don’t like the early day’s sunlight, my boyfriend gave me the master bedroom which gets less light and he has the second largest room that gets the sunrise he loves.”
How you spend the nighttime in your shared bedroom with your partner can also influence your daytime functioning, marital satisfaction, and psychological and physical health. And when 2 people with different bedtime preferences and nighttime schedules end up together, changing themselves just to please their partner’s needs might harm their relationship in the long run.
Sleeping in different bedrooms with your partner means that the 2 of you will have a place just for yourselves where you can relax after an exhausting day. This way, both of you can satisfy your needs without tiptoeing around and worrying about whether your partner might wake up because you want to watch the latest episode of your show before bed.
Even if you don’t remember waking up, disturbed sleep can have a negative impact on your overall health.
During the night, our brain cycles through the stages of sleep several times: light sleep, deep sleep, and REM (Rapid eye movement sleep). But when you interrupt the cycle by waking up during the night, it means that your brain spends more time in the light sleep stage and misses out on REM. And without sufficient REM your emotional well-being and cognitive performance suffer.
Interrupted sleep can also have short and long-term health consequences, like hypertension, weight-related issues, mental health problems, reduced quality of life, and other health-related issues.
People on Reddit share why they decided to sleep separately with their partner.
- “Because a good night’s sleep is more romantic than sharing a bed. I snore and toss and turn. He gives off literal village levels of heat in his sleep and I can’t stand the heat. I read, he can’t stand light. We keep different hours to an extent. A million reasons. We get along so much better this way.” — crankyweasels
- “My partner and I have completely separate bedrooms. We ’sleepover’ occasionally in each other’s rooms. However, we both sleep exponentially better apart. He’s a night owl and I’m an early bird. He wants only one sheet on him, I want 10 lbs of blankets. In addition, having a separate room allows me to decorate it however I want, have my own personal space, and keep it to the level of cleanliness I prefer. People look at us sideways when I mention the separate rooms thing, but it’s been a game-changer.” — eriasana
- “Different sleep cycles due to different work schedules. We are still madly in love and we both agreed to this because it’s the best for both of us.” — AFishInATank
- “Early in our relationship, 90% of our fights occurred in the bedroom. I like to sleep in a cold room with the fan on and white noise like a box fan. I also like to go to sleep with the TV on. She likes to sleep in a warm, still, cave in complete silence and darkness. We started sleeping in separate rooms and all of a sudden 90% of our fights stopped. Also, because we were getting real sleep, other fights turned more into heated discussions.” — ttc8420
What are your sleeping arrangements with your partner? Do you believe sleeping in different beds can help a relationship thrive?
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