While celebrating a new life and transitioning into a new role, a mother found herself struggling to get a moment alone after she welcomed her daughter. A time that was meant to be exciting for her and her husband led to them having a big fight over their parenting roles.
In the whirlwind of joy and exhaustion in the early days of parenthood, a mother found herself longing for a mere moment of quietness and alone time. She took to Reddit to share her frustrations. She started off by explaining that she had only had her child for two weeks. Her daughter was strictly breastfeeding, but in addition to cluster feeding, she realized her daughter found comfort in being close to her.
A mother holding her new born | Source: Shutterstock
This meant that her new role allowed her little to no time alone. “I’ve showered once by myself since having her, and it only lasted long enough for me to soap up before she was crying and my husband was bringing her into the bathroom with me. I think I literally had all of 2-3 minutes,” she wrote.
On the contrary, she noticed her husband’s life had not changed. He still got to have long and uninterrupted showers every day but never understood why his showers frustrated his wife.
Each time she was in the shower, and the baby would cry, her husband would bring their newborn to her to calm her down. It made her angry that he did not even try to calm the baby down on his own, but his excuse was that the child loved showers, and seeing her cry hurt him deeply.
A mother with her baby | Source: Shutterstock
As sweet as his fears sounded, the Redditor still needed to find a way to get a full self-care routine without a baby being handed over to her. So, she decided to call in help. She asked her mother to watch her daughter as she showered. Her husband was not there when she reached out to her child’s grandmother, but when he arrived, he asked what his mother-in-law was doing at their house.
Surprisingly, he was angry at his wife’s decision to call her mother just to take a shower. “I could have watched her. Why would you do that?” he asked, to which the Redditor responded, “Every time you watch her while I shower, she ends up in here with me within 2 minutes of me being in here because you don’t even try to calm her down.”
A mother with her baby | Source: Shutterstock
Therefore, after five days of trying to shave her legs, she could not wait to enjoy the warm water hitting her body and relaxing her muscles. “I need to self-care,” the Redditor emphasized.
The original poster’s honest account of her experience as a new mother erupted in a chorus of voices from commenters sharing their own experiences and offering support. One commenter challenged the husband’s logic and suggested, “If, according to hubby, showers calm her down, why isn’t he taking her on his 30-60 minute showers?”
A mother looking stressed with her child | Source: Shutterstock
Another suggestion was for the OP to lock the door as a temporary solution and to teach her husband a lesson on respecting someone’s privacy. Another Reddit user said the husband made himself look bad in front of his mother-in-law, but it was time he realized that he could also parent his daughter without always running to his wife.
The discussion took a deeper dive into the dynamics of communication and support within the relationship. Commenters pointed out the absurdity that the husband had been more concerned about his wife calling her mother rather than making sure that his wife’s well-being was attended to. “You found a way around it. And now, even knowing how hard it’s been for you, he’s still not actually concerned about you; he’s just worried about how it looks to your mum,” remarked a commenter.
A man sitting next to a crib looking stressed | Source: Shutterstock
One mother said her husband once interrupted her hair appointment but she had a serious conversation with him and made him look back at the number of haircuts he had had since their baby arrived. She told him never to interrupt her alone time unless it was an emergency, so the commenter advised the OP to have the same stern conversation with her husband.
A couple fighting | Source: Shutterstock
Another commenter shared a personal story of how her husband had slacked at the beginning of their parenting journey and how she eventually found a way to work as a team. The mother said her baby was a bit fussy on the first night home and she would always take the lead and calm her down.
But after three days, she put on earplugs and requested her husband only wake her up when the baby needed a feed and let her partner take care of the baby during the night, which led to a more equitable parenting dynamic.
The commenter added that allocating responsibilities helped them both understand the difficulty and joy of caring for a newborn, but it also allowed them to foster empathy and understanding. “That night, my partner became an equal parent,” the commenter added.
Here is a story about a newborn who cried nonstop no matter what the parents did. But they eventually realized the answer to their child’s misery was in the crib.
Inside a ‘Dystopian’ Apartment Block Where That Houses Over 20,000 Residence
Deemed a “Dystopian Apartment,” a building in China has recently gone viral on TikTok. Incredibly, it has the ability to host up to 30,000 residents.
The video was posted by @fatheristheone using a drone and caught people’s attention for more than just the impressive interior and unique design.
People were also astonished after seeing footage that truly captivates the enormity of the building.
Many people have read at least one novel focusing on a Dystopian society. Or at least understand that it describes a society that lives in fear or has been dehumanized.
Most works have been fiction, although some might argue they’re a possible warning about the future.
Either way, China currently has an apartment building that can house up to 30,000 residents at one time. Furthermore, containing everything residents could possibly need.
Features of the Dystopian Apartment
The “dystopian” apartment, called the Regent International, is located in Qianjiang Century City, more specifically, in Hangzhou’s central business district.
The building was actually designed by Alicia Loo, chief designer of a 7-star hotel called the Singapore Sands Hotel, and was inaugurated in 2013.
Impressively, the building is 675 feet tall and is currently home to around 20,000 residents. It is an S-shape and has 36, or 39, floors depending upon which side of the building you are.
Unsurprisingly, it’s one of the most densely populated areas in the world, thanks to the numerous residents coexisting under one giant roof.
Within the more than 30 floors of the Regent International, there are a number of amenities. Some include restaurants, swimming pools, and nail salons.
The building also contains its own grocery stores and internet cafes. Essentially, anything one might find “in town” can be found indoors the “dystopian apartment”.
As a result, many residents may never step foot outside again. Posing the question, will they also never get any fresh air or feel the sunlight on their skin? First, the residents aren’t forced to stay indoors, nor are they forced to live in the “dystopian apartment.”
In contrast, most residents are young professionals and influencers or college students. Both of them greatly benefit from the cost-effectiveness and convenience of living in a place such as an S-shaped building.
Advantageous Living
Living there seems to be incredibly convenient for residents as they have everything they could possibly need under one roof.
Convenience isn’t the only advantage. Its affordability is another great benefit to living at Regent International.
Units vary in size and cost but range from 1,500 RMB, which is equivalent to around $200.00 per month, to 4,000 RMB, which is just under $600.00 per month.
While some are apprehensive, calling it a “dystopian apartment,” others have praised the innovation behind the building. It’s even been called “the most sustainable living building on earth.”
Another interesting advantage comes to light in the midst of a housing crisis that is seemingly sweeping the U.S. The “dystopian apartment” could serve as a model for how the U.S. can possibly create more living spaces for people without taking up copious amounts of land.
Interestingly, one state has already developed something like the hotel turned apartment city. Whittier, a city in Alaska, has a 14-floor building in which all 272 residents live. It, like the building in China, has everything one would find “in town.” This includes a church, school, post office, and police station.
Possible Downsides
Like everything in life, this, too, has pros and cons. After all, the building has been referred to as “dystopian apartment” for a reason.
As previously mentioned, many people are wondering how so many people can live in one place. U.S. residents tend to prefer privacy. Space from their neighbors. Even a yard to hang out in or for their dogs to play.
A major drawback to a housing solution like this is that people will have very little space of their own, with little opportunity to be outdoors or get fresh air. Luckily, the problem of getting fresh air can be remedied by taking a stroll or renting one of the larger units in the Regent International, as some come with balconies, providing some relief from living in there.
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