renowned for saying “don’t touch me” a lot.When Howie Mandel gave Reba McEntire a firm hug on The Voice stage in September 2023, it stunned everyone.
The comedian caved in to his excitement and was unable to resist the country music star’s allure because he suffers from a crippling phobia of germs.
Mandel appears upbeat and joyful when he is in the spotlight, but when he is not, he discloses that he is a “scared” guy who would rather live “in the fetal position.”
Furthermore, he just made a startling admission that disclosed how he controls the OCD that drives him to “absolute hell.”To find out more, continue reading!
Many people’s inner germaphobe was let loose by the horror of the global epidemic, making them more aware of the risks of contamination.
While many people’s fear of germs passed after a few years, for others it remains crippling and never goes away.
“It is impossible for me to live a day in my life without thinking that we might not survive,” says Howie Mandel, a man who has experienced extreme anxiety and obsessive compulsive disorder (OCD) since he was a little child. The 68-year-old TV personality says the pandemic was particularly upsetting in an interview with People, saying, “But the comfort I would get would be the fact that everybody around me was okay.” It’s a good idea to hold on. However, everything in the world was not well throughout the pandemic. And it was just the worst.
OCD is defined as a “pattern of unwanted thoughts and fears known as obsessions” by the Mayo Clinic. These obsessions cause you to engage in compulsive activities, or repeating actions. These compulsions and obsessions are very distressing and interfere with day-to-day tasks.
“I’m in a bad dream,” declares the comedian who was born in Canada. “I attempt to ground myself. Mandel remarks, “I have a great family, including my wife Terry and their three children, Riley, Jackie, and Alex, who were married in 1980. “I adore what I do,” However, I can sometimes have periods of deep depression from which I cannot recover.
The best medicine is laughter.
Mandel, who got his big break on the medical drama St. Elsewhere in 1982, says that although every day is difficult, comedy gets him through it.
“I use humor as a coping mechanism. I’m crying if I’m not laughing. I haven’t been transparent enough about how dark and terrible things truly get.
Mandel continues, “I’m most at ease onstage,” adding that he uses humor to fend off the allure of OCD. And it’s not nice when I withdraw inside myself when I have nothing to do.
Mandel consistently finds time for projects, contributing his unmatched sense of humor to all of them. He hosts multiple shows in addition to acting as a judge on the America’s Got Talent (AGT) franchise.
“Very heavily medicated”
He opened up to Kelly Clarkson about his mental health concerns during a conversation they had on her talk show in 2022.
“I have OCD and am neurotic.people believe that because I’m out and about, I’m having fun and enjoying myself.I’m terrified. He said to the host, “I like to go home and just live in the fetal position.”
Clarkson retorted, “It’s so funny to me, because every time I’m around you, even seeing you out of work…you’re so the opposite of what I would think,” looking surprised by Mandel’s shadow persona.
Mandel chuckled, “I know, I’m such a joy, I’m a light, I’m an energy, and I’m stunning.” “..To be really honest, I take a lot of medication.
embracing Reba
He may have been excited to see Reba McEntire on The Voice because of that medicine.
Mandel, a panelist on the show, leaped from the audience and called her name. He then hurried up to the country music expert and said, “We’re right next door shooting the AGT finale.” Could you please sign my shirt?
After McEntire signed his “I [heart] Reba” shirt, Mandel gave an unexpected, tight hug to the audience.
Carson Daly, the show’s host, remarked of the man who usually avoids physical contact, “You don’t see that every day.”
Mandel acknowledges his perplexing actions, saying, “People notice discrepancies, particularly in the media.” “He shook someone’s hand,” or “Oh, he hugged someone.” I’m able to give you a handshake. Then I would believe that I hadn’t cleaned it thoroughly. And I would spend hours washing my hands by going back and forth in a circle.
He goes on, “I understand the funny in that,” determined to continue the discourse about mental health. But that doesn’t lessen how excruciatingly awful it is. I also don’t want to justify my emotional well-being. All I want is to keep it going.
Since Mandel was “boosted” and “vaccinated,” his Covid-19 was mild in 2022, serving as a reminder that being afraid of illness is insufficient to keep you safe.
How do you feel about Howie Mandel’s candor regarding his mental health? Kindly share this story with us and let us know what you think so we can start a discourse!
After My Brother’s Funeral, His Widow Gave Me a Letter – I Wasn’t Ready for What He’d Confessed
At my brother’s funeral, I expected sorrow and silence, not a sealed letter that would turn my world upside down. What he confessed inside rewrote everything I thought I knew about my family.
The sky was gray the morning of my brother’s funeral. The kind of gray that seeps into your bones. Cold, quiet, still.
A gloomy day at a cemetery | Source: Pexels
I stood beside my parents near the front of the small chapel. My black coat felt too tight. My shoes pinched. But I didn’t care. None of that mattered. What mattered was that Eric was gone.
People filled the seats. Some cried. Some just stared ahead. My mother sat stiff, clutching a tissue she never used. Her eyes stayed dry.
“Are you okay, Mom?” I whispered.
People at a funeral service | Source: Pexels
She nodded but didn’t look at me. “Fine, Lily. Just tired.”
She wasn’t fine. She was strange. Distant.
My dad leaned toward a cousin in the second row, whispering something I couldn’t hear. When he noticed me watching, he turned away fast.
Something felt off. Not just sadness. Something else.
A woman standing near a coffin | Source: Pexels
I kept catching them looking at me. My mom. My dad. And then looking away like they were guilty.
Eric’s widow, Laura, sat alone a few rows ahead. Her shoulders shook as she wiped her face. Real tears. Real pain. She didn’t fake it.
When the service ended, people left in twos and threes. Some hugged me. Some said nothing. I barely noticed.
A young woman at a funeral | Source: Pexels
Outside, the wind picked up. I stood by a tree near the parking lot, just needing air.
That’s when I saw Laura, walking toward me with something in her hands.
“Lily,” she said. Her voice cracked. “I need to give you this.”
“What is it?”
A woman holding a letter | Source: Midjourney
She held out an envelope. My name was written on the front in Eric’s handwriting.
“He asked me to give it to you. After.”
I stared at it. “After what?”
She looked away. “After everything.”
Two women talking at a funeral | Source: Midjourney
I took it with shaking hands. The envelope felt heavier than paper should.
“Did he… say anything else?” I asked.
She shook her head. “No. Just that it was important.”
I didn’t open it right away. I didn’t want to. Not yet.
A sealed letter on a table | Source: Pexels
I drove home in silence. I sat in the car for a while, staring at the envelope in my lap. My name looked strange in his writing. Like he was still here. Like he’d speak if I opened it.
But I didn’t. Not yet. My mind went back. To him. To us.
Eric was never the warm kind. No hugs. No late-night talks. He never called just to say hi.
A serious man looking at the camera | Source: Pexels
But he always showed up. He came to my high school graduation. Sat in the front row, silent, hands folded.
When I was in the hospital with the flu at sixteen, he was there. Just sitting. Didn’t say much. But didn’t leave.
He was like a shadow. Always around. Never close.
Sometimes, when I looked at him, I felt something more. Like there was something he wanted to say but never did.
A serious man looking to his side | Source: Pexels
He’d glance at me, open his mouth, then close it again. Now he never would.
I walked into my house, sat at the kitchen table, and stared at the envelope one more time. Then I broke the seal.
The paper inside the envelope was folded once. It smelled faintly like him—old books and cologne. My hands shook as I opened it.
A woman opening a letter | Source: Pexels
My dearest Lily,
There’s no easy way to write this. I’ve started and stopped this letter more times than I can count. If you’re reading it, then I never found the courage to say this to your face. I’m sorry for that.
Lily… I’m not just your brother. I’m your father.
I stared at the words. My heart dropped. My stomach twisted.
A shocked woman reading a letter | Source: Pexels
I was fifteen. Young. Stupid. I fell in love with someone who got scared when she found out she was pregnant. She wanted to leave, to run. My parents stepped in. They said they’d raise you as their own—and that I could be your brother. It was supposed to protect you.
But I never stopped being your dad. Not for a single day.
Tears blurred the words. I wiped them away with the sleeve of my sweater.
A man writing a letter | Source: Pexels
I wanted to tell you every time you smiled. Every birthday. Every school play. I wanted to say, ‘That’s my girl.’ But I didn’t. Because I was a boy pretending to be someone I wasn’t.
So I watched you grow from the side. I showed up when I could. I stayed close, but never too close. That was the deal. And the older you got, the harder it got.
A woman reading a letter | Source: Midjourney
I’m sorry I didn’t fight harder. I’m sorry I wasn’t brave. You deserved more than silence. You deserved the truth.
I love you, Lily. Always.
Love, Dad
The word Dad hit me like a wave.
A shocked woman looking at a letter | Source: Pexels
I dropped the letter and pressed my hands over my mouth. I couldn’t breathe. I cried right there at the kitchen table. Ugly, loud sobs. My chest ached. My whole life had shifted in the space of one page.
That night, I didn’t sleep.
The next morning, I drove to Laura’s house. She opened the door slowly. Her eyes were red, like mine.
A grieving woman opening the door of her house | Source: Midjourney
“You read it,” she whispered.
I nodded.
“Can I come in?”
She stepped aside. We sat in her living room in silence.
A sad woman sitting in her chair | Source: Pexels
“I didn’t know until after we got married,” she finally said. “He told me one night after a bad dream. He was shaking. I asked what was wrong, and he told me everything.”
I looked at her. “Why didn’t he ever tell me?”
Laura swallowed hard. “He wanted to. So many times. But he was scared. Scared it would break your heart. Scared you’d hate him.”
An upset woman looking down | Source: Pexels
I rubbed my hands together. “It makes sense now. All of it. The distance. The quiet way he loved me. It always felt like something was being held back.”
“He loved you more than anything, Lily. That letter tore him apart. But he made me promise—if anything ever happened to him, I had to give it to you.”
“I didn’t know him,” I whispered. “Not really.”
One woman comforting the other one | Source: Pexels
Laura reached for my hand. “You did. You just didn’t know why he was the way he was.”
I nodded slowly. A tear rolled down my cheek, but I didn’t wipe it away.
“I wish he’d told me sooner.”
“So did he.”
A crying woman looking at the camera | Source: Pexels
We sat quietly again. Nothing more needed to be said. But I knew what I had to do next.
I parked outside the house I grew up in. It looked the same. White shutters, neat yard, small porch. But it felt different now—like a place built on secrets.
I rang the bell. My mom opened the door, her smile ready. It dropped the second she saw my face.
A serious woman standing on the porch | Source: Midjourney
“Lily?”
“We need to talk.”
She stepped back without a word.
My dad was in the kitchen, sipping coffee. He looked up, startled.
“Hey, sweetheart—”
A mature man drinking coffee | Source: Pexels
“Why didn’t you tell me?” I said, my voice sharper than I meant. “Why did you lie to me my whole life?”
They exchanged a look. My mom sat down. Her hands trembled.
“We didn’t lie,” she said softly. “We were trying to protect you.”
“From what? From the truth? From my own father?”
A sad mature woman | Source: Pexels
“You were a baby,” my dad said. “We thought it would be easier. Simpler.”
“For who? Me? Or you?”
My mom’s eyes filled. “We didn’t want you to feel different. Or confused. Eric was so young. He wasn’t ready.”
“He was ready,” I snapped. “He showed up for me in ways you didn’t even notice. He was there. Always. But I never got to call him Dad. Not once.”
A shouting young woman | Source: Pexels
My mother stood and tried to touch my arm. I stepped back.
“Don’t,” I said. “Please.”
“I’m sorry,” she whispered. “We were scared.”
I nodded slowly. “Well, now I’m the one who’s scared. Because I don’t know who I am anymore. And I don’t know how to forgive you.”
A crying woman wiping her nose | Source: Pexels
My father set his mug down like it weighed too much. “Take all the time you need. We’ll be here.”
“I need space,” I said. “That’s all I can ask for right now.”
They didn’t argue. My mom wiped her eyes. My dad just nodded.
I walked out, the letter pressed to my chest like it was the only thing keeping me standing.
A woman walking out clutching a letter to her chest | Source: Midjourney
That night, I sat alone in my apartment, the letter open on the table again. I read it slowly, tracing the lines with my finger.
The pain was still there. But something else was too. Peace. A beginning.
I found a small frame in the back of my closet. I placed the letter inside and set it on my bookshelf.
Right in the center. Where I could see it every day.
A framed letter on a sunlit bookshelf | Source: Midjourney
He was my father. And now, I finally know.
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