Family gatherings were the worst for Lara, especially since her sister, Emily, began to make fun of her love life, or lack thereof. Determined to sit through her father’s birthday dinner, Lara decides to hire a boyfriend for the night. Little did she know that a romantic comedy would play out.
I love my family, but family gatherings used to be a nightmare for me. Every single time we got together, my sister Emily would find some way or the other to poke fun at my single life.
Last Thanksgiving, she took it too far and even set a place at the table for my “imaginary boyfriend,” complete with a hand-drawn face on a napkin. Everyone around the table laughed while I forced a smile.
“It’s funny, Lara!” she would say whenever I brought up the incident.
It was anything but funny.
Now, my father’s birthday is coming up, and of course, it was to be celebrated with a family dinner.
“There’s no way I can sit through another one of those events with my family,” I told my friend, Kate, when we met for coffee.
“I’m telling you now, Emily probably has something up her sleeve already,” I grumbled.
“Then just hire someone out for the night!” Kate chuckled, adding sugar to her coffee.
“Hire a man?” I exclaimed.
“Yes! My sister did it through an agency. She didn’t want to go to her ex-boyfriend’s wedding by herself, so she found the agency. Look, it’s all above board and the guys do exactly what you need them to do.”
“It’s not… sleazy?” I asked, trying to think of a better word.
“No, Lara,” she giggled. “And you know my sister. She’s so prim and proper! She wouldn’t have gone ahead with it if she didn’t think that everything was legitimate.”
Which is how I ended up hiring a date to the family gathering. I found Jake through the same agency that Kate’s sister used. He was charming, easy to talk to, and seemed to understand exactly what I needed.
We met a few times before the dinner to get our story straight, because the last thing I wanted was Emily to get wind of something fishy.
“So, the story is that we met at a mutual friend’s party, hit it off over their dog, and have been dating for three months,” Jake said, grinning. “Sounds about right.”
“Look, any story involving myself and a dog are winners,” I replied, opening our Chinese takeout for dinner.
“And I’m an architect with a passion for cooking, right?” he confirmed.
A 17-year-old boy, who works part-time at Pizza Hut, arrives and parks a stunning Porsche in front of the house.
Picture this: a 17-year-old boy who works part-time at Pizza Hut pulls up in front of his house one day in a stunning Porsche. His parents are stunned by the sight of the luxurious car and immediately demand an explanation.
“Where did you get that car?” they ask, completely bewildered.
“I bought it today,” calmly responds the teen.
His mom’s concern gets the better of her as she demands, “With what money, young man? We know how much a Porsche costs, and you cannot afford it!”
The boy explains, “Well, it’s used, and I got a good deal. This one only cost me 20 dollars.”
Shocked, his mom exclaims, “Who on earth would sell a car like that for 20 dollars?!”
“The woman up the street,” the boy replies. “I don’t know her name – she just moved in. She ordered a pizza, and when I delivered it to her, she asked me if I wanted to buy a Porsche for 20 dollars.”
Unable to contain their curiosity and anger, the boy’s dad and mom rush over to their new neighbor’s house, ready to demand an explanation. To their surprise, they find their new neighbor calmly planting flowers in her front yard.
Approaching her with determination, the dad speaks up, “I’m the father of the kid you just sold a sports car to for $20. I need an explanation from you!”
The woman, still focused on her gardening, looks up and calmly responds, “Well, this morning, I received a phone call from my husband. I thought he was on a business trip in Florida, but it turns out he has run off to Hawaii with his secretary and has no intention of coming back.”
Perplexed, the mom interjects, “What on earth does that have to do with selling our son a Porsche for $20?”
Smiling brightly, the new neighbor pauses for a moment before answering, “Well, my husband asked me to sell his new Porsche and send him the money. So, I did.”
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