John Sims moved to Tucson, Arizona, in an effort to live a more restrained lifestyle. He never imagined that it would become one of the most memorable moments of his life. It all started when the former owner of his new home told him about a worrying rumor.
Rumor had it that something was hidden on the property. John could not get the idea out of his brain, so he started digging in the backyard. What he discovered made him cringe. He did not, without a doubt, sign up for this.
The house in the mysterious backyard
John Sims had heard about a friend’s selling of a house in midtown Tucson, Arizona, and was eager to buy. Since the owner was one of his buddies, he knew he would be in good hands. But after he finished the papers, he heard of a rumor about the property from an associate.
The elders of the community claim that they believe something fascinating is hidden away somewhere in it. Though his partner was never able to solve the puzzle, John might be able to. John would ultimately discover something that would delight people all across the state of Arizona.
His insatiable curiosity won out.
As John started to organize his belongings in his new house, he couldn’t help but think back to what his friend had said. He was curious, but he was also interested. He quickly had a strong desire to solve the mysteries surrounding his new house.
After digging, John started to look about his land. John dug four different holes in the backyard before realizing there was nothing there. If he couldn’t find it under the grass, then whatever it is, it’s got to be under the bricks.
X denotes the place.
John found the construction documents of his house when he was granted access to local records. It turned out that Whitaker Pools was an unusual facility that had been built in 1961. Now that he had proof that there was something buried on the property, John was even more determined to solve the mystery.
He enlisted consultants equipped with metal detectors to help him locate it. Once there and equipped with the appropriate tools, a group investigated John’s backyard. Before long, the metal detectors began to sound. John marked the locations of the two metal detector triggers with a huge X in the chalk.
making a connection
After the consultants were dismissed, John excitedly grabbed a shovel and got to work digging. His shovel struck something metal really quickly. Finally he felt something three feet under the grass. John decided to stop and think after making some progress.
Is it possible that this was a septic tank? What would happen if he succeeded in damaging or breaking a pipe? He had to exercise extreme caution. However, the more he dug with precision, the more he sensed that something was off. He was going to solve his own garden puzzle.
Opening the hatch
John later found what looked to be the aperture of a hatch. He bent to clear some dirt, then used a pry bar to pry open the metal cover. John was cautious not to breathe in too much since he might be in contact with mold spores or toxic gas vapors.
John left the lid open for nearly a day in order to let any air from below escape and let fresh air into the structure. He also knew that the air in the little space needs to be tested for mold before entering.
It wasn’t safe.
John glanced through the hatch the next morning. A spiral staircase that led below was revealed to him. Though most would have been so happy that they would have started walking down right immediately, John wasn’t that foolish.
He knew more now. As the captain of the Rural/Metro Fire Department, he needed someone close by in case the lid fell back in. There was no way he could lift the lid from underneath on his own now that he was home alone.
Forming a group
Because of his considerable training and experience in rescuing people from tight spaces, John was aware of all the risks. He could see that the staircase was unsteady and that going into the shaft by itself would be too dangerous.
It was John who decided to form a team. He summoned some friends over to lend a hand. Some might act as spotters while others could help him with the excavation when it was safe enough to explore what was inside the shaft.
Making a strategy
The team assembled the next day and set to work creating a blueprint. They discussed the best course of action as well. One of their first acts was to reinforce and rebuild the concrete framework surrounding the steps.
They built Sonotube cardboard around the entryway to keep everyone safe while they worked. John and his team worked hard to pour concrete layers and secure the rebar inside the hatch.
It took a lot of work.
To protect the team and the hatch, John had to cover the hatch with a tarpaulin. It was starting to become too hot in Arizona. When they took pauses from the heat, they speculated about what might be down there.
We had a lot of work ahead of us in order to get the answers. An electrical line has to be constructed in order to provide sufficient lighting within the shaft and to use power equipment when needed. To bring in fresh air, a black pipe was also installed into the shaft.
figuring out the entrance
They had finally finished building the area around the structure. However, the spiral staircase presented another challenge. The steps were so corroded that it was impossible to determine whether they could sustain any weight. They needed to figure out another way inside without going up the stairs.
John had to take great care to descend the team’s ladder without cutting himself on the rusty steps. John was excited beyond belief. He was going to be the first to figure out the code. It was finally the moment he had been waiting for.
There was still unresolved business.
When they reached the bottom, John was relieved to hear they did not need to dig any deeper. Still, more work needed to be done. The tunnel ceilings’ fiberglass covering was slowly breaking down. This suggested that there was still a risk to the building.
John was shocked to discover, after a thorough inspection, that the structure was essentially undamaged despite being abandoned for nearly fifty years. Later on, even though it was unoccupied at the time, it was found to be John’s backyard nuclear bomb bunker!
starting in the era of the Cold War
It all became obvious at once. The shelter was built during the Cold War, when the United States and the Soviet Union feared full-scale nuclear war. At that point, Whitaker Pools added bomb shelters to their line of business.
Actually, there were bomb shelters on several sites around Tucson. In the case of a nuclear war, that was the best a responsible family man could do at the time to protect his loved ones.
Tucson’s historical past
Bombs and Tucson, it turns out, have a long history together. Tucson was dubbed the “rocket town” because it possessed eighteen ballistic missiles that could cross continents and destroy an area of 900 square miles.
By the conclusion of the Cold War, almost all of the missiles in the missile silos had been rendered unusable, but the government continued to keep them top secret. Most nuclear bunkers were dismantled or shut up in the early 1980s.
growing in acceptance
John shared his garden discovery on Reddit and quickly became well-known. The post has received hundreds of comments in a matter of hours. Local publications and TV shows started getting in touch to set up interviews about it.
The story was covered by international outlets such as the Daily Mail. John’s tale has also been told in Japan. Undoubtedly a noteworthy finding. Tucson locals started to fear as well, in case they had one in their backyard.
What happens after that?
The attention he received helped John make relationships with people in the community who had fallout shelters. He had the chance to ask them about their cleaning procedure and get advice on how to use it going forward.
John wants to build a museum dedicated to the Cold War, but most others turned theirs into wine cellars or man caves. After conducting a great deal of research on the Cold War era, John started collecting relics such as Geiger counters, water supply barrels, HAM radios, and sanitation kits.
His thoughts after making this discovery
“I was really hoping it was going to be a little microcosm… a time capsule full of radiation detectors, cots, civil defense boxes, and stuff like that,” John stated in an interview. Sadly, the bomb shelter was devoid of any furnishings at all.
John also talked about his extensive reading on the Cold War. He believes that the Cuban Missile Crisis was probably the primary cause of Tucson residents’ decision to construct bomb shelters in their backyards during the 1960s.
Suggestions for Tucson residents
John suggests that Tucson locals look through City of Tucson or Pima County data to see whether there is a bomb shelter located in their backyard. The information will probably be in the building permits.
John also warns everyone not to dive in too quickly when someone finds a bomb shelter in the yard. John continued by saying that it’s generally not a good idea to jump into earthly openings because the poisonous air in a tunnel or cave-in can render a person quickly unconscious.
requesting financial support
John intends to completely remodel the bomb shelter. But he didn’t have that much money. He set up a GoFundMe campaign to gather money for the renovation of his bomb bunker from the 1960s. He also planned to restore the interior in addition to the entryway.
John’s first priority was to replace the steps so that everyone could enter safely. John and the remodeling crew may now enter and exit the building safely, something he was only able to do with the money he was able to raise.
The HOA President Fined Me Over My Lawn – I Provided Him with More Reasons to Pay Attention
Larry, our clipboard-wielding HOA dictator, had no idea who he was messing with when he fined me for my lawn being half an inch too long. I decided to give him something to really look at, a lawn so outrageous, yet so perfectly within the rules, that he’d regret ever starting this fight.
For decades, my neighborhood was the kind of place where you could sip tea on your porch in peace, wave to the neighbors, and not worry about a thing.
Then Larry got his grubby hands on the HOA presidency.
Oh, Larry. You know the type: mid-50s, born in a pressed polo shirt, thinks the world revolves around his clipboard. From the moment he took office, it was like someone handed him the keys to a kingdom.
Or at least, that’s what he thought.
Now, I’ve been living here for twenty-five years. Raised three kids in this house. Buried a husband too. And you know what I’d learned?
Don’t mess with a woman who’s survived kids and a man who thought barbeque sauce was a vegetable. Larry clearly didn’t get that memo.
Ever since I skipped his precious HOA meeting last summer, he’s been out for blood. Like I needed to hear two hours of droning on about fence heights and paint colors. I had more important things to do — like watching my begonias bloom.
It all started last week.
I was out on the porch, minding my business, when I spotted Larry marching up the driveway, clipboard in hand.
“Oh, here we go,” I muttered, already feeling my blood pressure spike.
He stopped right at the foot of the steps, and didn’t even bother with a hello.
“Mrs. Pearson,” he began, his voice dripping with condescension. “I’m afraid you’ve violated the HOA’s lawn maintenance standards.”
I blinked at him, trying to keep my temper in check. “Is that so? The lawn’s been freshly mowed. Just did it two days ago.”
“Well,” he said, clicking his pen like he was about to write me up for a felony, “it’s half an inch too long. HOA standards are very clear about this.”
I stared at him. Half. An. Inch. “You’ve got to be kidding me.”
His smug little grin told me otherwise.
“We have standards here, Mrs. Pearson. If we let one person get away with neglecting their lawn, what kind of message does that send?”
Oh, I could’ve throttled him right there. But I didn’t. Instead, I just smiled sweetly and said, “Thanks for the heads-up, Larry. I’ll be sure to trim that extra half-inch for you.”
Inside, though? I was fuming. Who did this guy think he was? Half an inch?
I’ve survived diaper blowouts, PTA meetings, and a husband who once tried to roast marshmallows using a propane torch. I wasn’t about to let Larry the Clipboard King push me around.
That night, I sat in my armchair, stewing over the whole thing. I thought about all the times in my life I’d been told to “follow the rules,” and how I’d managed to bend them just enough to keep my sanity.
If Larry wanted to play hardball, fine. Two could play that game.
And then it hit me: the HOA rulebook. That stupid, dusty old thing Larry was always quoting. I hadn’t bothered with it much over the years, but now it was time to get acquainted.
I flipped through it for a good hour, and there it was. Clear as day. Lawn decorations, tasteful, of course, were completely allowed, as long as they stayed within certain size and placement guidelines.
Oh, Larry. You poor, unfortunate soul. You had no idea what you’d just unleashed.
The very next morning, I went on the shopping spree of a lifetime. It was glorious. I bought gnomes. Not just any gnomes, though, giant ones. One was holding a lantern, another was fishing in a little fake pond I set up in the garden.
And an entire flock of pink, plastic flamingos. I clustered them together like they were planning some sort of tropical rebellion.
Then came the solar lights. I lined the walkway, the garden, and even hung a few in the trees. By the time I was done, my yard looked like a cross between a fairy tale and a Florida souvenir shop.
And the best part? Every single piece was perfectly HOA-compliant. Not a single rule was broken. I leaned back in my lawn chair, watching the sun set behind my masterpiece.
The twinkling lights came to life, casting a warm glow over my gnome army and the flamingo brigade. It was, in a word, glorious.
But Larry, oh Larry, was not going to take this lying down.
The first time he saw my yard, I knew I had him. I was watering the petunias when I spotted his car creeping down the street. His windows rolled down, his eyes narrowing as they scanned every inch of my lawn.
The way his jaw clenched, his fingers tight on the steering wheel — it was priceless. He slowed to a crawl, staring at the gnome with the margarita, lounging in his lawn chair like he didn’t have a care in the world.
I gave Larry a little wave, extra sweet, as if I didn’t know I’d just declared war.
He stared at me, his face turning the color of a sunburned tomato, and then, without a word, he sped off.
I let out a laugh so loud it startled a squirrel in the oak tree. “That’s right, Larry. You can’t touch this.”
For a few days, I thought maybe, just maybe, he’d let it go. Silly me. A week later, there he was again, stomping up to my door with that clipboard, wearing his HOA President badge like he’d been knighted.
“Mrs. Pearson,” he began, not even bothering with pleasantries, “I’ve come to inform you that your mailbox violates HOA standards.”
I blinked at him. “The mailbox?” I tilted my head toward it. “Larry, I just painted that thing two months ago. It’s pristine.”
He squinted at it like he’d found some imaginary flaw. “The paint is chipping,” he insisted, scribbling something on his clipboard.
I glanced at the mailbox again. Not a chip in sight. But I knew this wasn’t about the mailbox. This was personal.
“You’ve got a lot of nerve,” I muttered, crossing my arms. “All this over half an inch of grass?”
“I’m just enforcing the rules,” Larry said, but the look in his eyes told a different story.
I narrowed my eyes at him. “Sure, Larry. Whatever helps you sleep at night.”
He turned on his heel and strutted back to his car like he’d just delivered some life-altering decree. I watched him go, fury bubbling up inside me. Oh, he thought he could win this? Fine. Let the games begin.
That night, I hatched a plan. If Larry wanted a fight, he was going to get one. I spent the next morning back at the garden store, loading up on more gnomes, more flamingos, and just for fun, a motion-activated sprinkler system.
By the time I was done, my yard looked like a carnival of absurdity. Gnomes of all sizes stood proudly in formation, some fishing, some holding tiny shovels, and one, my new favorite, lounging in a hammock with a miniature beer in hand.
The flamingos? They’d formed their own pink plastic army, marching across the lawn with solar lights guiding their way.
But the pièce de résistance? The sprinkler system. Every time Larry came by to inspect my yard, the motion sensor would activate, spraying water in every direction. Totally by accident, of course.
The first time it happened, I nearly fell off the porch laughing.
Larry pulled up, clipboard ready, only to be met with a stream of water straight to the face. He spluttered, waving his arms like a drowning cat, and retreated to his car, soaked to the bone.
The look of pure outrage on his face was worth every penny I’d spent.
But the best part? The neighbors started to notice.
One by one, they began stopping by to compliment my “creative flair.”
Mrs. Johnson from three houses down said she loved the “whimsical” atmosphere. Mr. Thompson chuckled, saying he hadn’t seen Larry so flustered in years. And soon, it wasn’t just compliments. The neighbors started putting up their own lawn decorations.
It began with a few garden gnomes, but soon, flamingos popped up all over the cul-de-sac, twinkling lights appeared in every yard, and someone even set up a miniature windmill.
Larry couldn’t keep up.
His clipboard became a joke. The once-feared fines became a badge of honor among the residents, and the more he tried to tighten his grip, the more the neighborhood slipped through his fingers.
Every day, Larry had to drive past our gnomes, our flamingos, and our lights, knowing full well that we’d beaten him at his own game.
And me? I watched the chaos unfold with a smile on my face.
The whole neighborhood had come together, united by lawn ornaments and sheer spite. And Larry, poor Larry, was left powerless, just a man with a soggy clipboard and no authority to back it up.
So, Larry, if you’re reading this, keep on looking. I’ve got plenty more ideas where these came from.
Leave a Reply