My story is about how my ex-husband’s girlfriend realized a truth about him that I grew too comfortable with while married to him. With one important question, his new girlfriend taught me a valuable lesson about self-love after reaching out unexpectedly.
I’ve been divorced for five years now, and it’s been an interesting journey navigating life post-marriage. My ex-husband, Ben, 48, and I, 45, were together for 13 years and had two wonderful kids. Even after our split, we’ve managed to stay on good terms.
We co-parent effectively despite our marriage having its ups and downs. Ben and I are best friends and have also maintained a friendship that surprises most people. Our divorce wasn’t messy; we simply wanted different things out of life.
Yesterday was our eldest’s 16th birthday, and we decided to celebrate with a family dinner. Ben has been seeing someone new, a woman named Lisa, for about four months. He told me about her as soon as their relationship got serious.
Transparency was part of our agreement to keep things open and honest for the sake of our children. He asked if he could bring Lisa to the birthday dinner, and while I wasn’t thrilled as I would have preferred to meet her one-on-one first, I didn’t want to cause any drama or be intrusive. So, I agreed.
On that fateful day, I finally got to meet Lisa who was friendly, and eager to make a good impression, which was a relief. I preferred her to be a good person if she was going to be around my children.
She’s got a kind smile and she immediately struck up a conversation with me about the kids’ school and activities. I could tell she was trying hard to fit in, which I appreciated.
As the evening went on, I noticed how attentive Lisa was to Ben. It was sweet but also a little unsettling because I never saw that side of him during our marriage. I chalked it up to new relationship energy and tried to focus on the kids and the celebration.
Halfway through dinner, things got weird when my eldest handed me a birthday card from her father. This caught me off guard because my birthday was months ago. No one usually remembers it, and Ben has never been one to recall such occasions.
Don’t get me wrong, my children’s father is a great man. But he’s really terrible with things like anniversaries, birthdays, or any special occasions. During all the years we were together, Ben never got me a present or card.
It was also my responsibility to handle events like the kids’ birthdays, Christmas, and more. I don’t know if I was wrong for this, but his forgetfulness didn’t bother me. I thanked my daughter, feeling touched by the gesture.
Lisa, sitting across from me, saw my surprise. I had assumed she’d made him get it, but then I noticed how she was giving me these funny looks. Unsure what they meant, I decided to mingle with other guests to avoid the awkwardness.
But, Lisa somehow managed to get my attention. “Ben mentioned he’s not great with birthdays,” she said with a chuckle. “He forgot mine a few weeks ago. Is it intentional?”
I laughed, remembering all the missed anniversaries and forgotten special days. “I have no idea, Lisa, but 13 years of marriage and two kids wasn’t the benchmark because he never really got the hang of it,” I replied. “It’s just who he is.”
Lisa seemed disappointed and tried to hide it, but I thought nothing of it and wandered off to talk to other guests. I decided to shift the conversation to something lighter and talked about family plans and the upcoming holidays. The rest of the evening went smoothly, and we all parted ways with smiles and hugs.
Later that night, as I was getting ready for bed, I received a text from an unknown number. It was my ex’s new girlfriend. “Hi, this is Lisa. I got your number from Ben. I hope it’s okay to text you. I wanted to ask you something.”
Curious, I replied, “Sure, what’s up?”
Her response came quickly and when I read it, I was STUNNED. She hadn’t gotten over our brief conversation earlier and was asking if Ben’s forgetfulness of special occasions was something that could be fixed. “I know this might seem odd because we touched on it earlier, but I need to know…”
“…Does Ben ever improve when it comes to birthdays and anniversaries? I don’t want to make a big deal out of it if it’s something that won’t change.” I stared at my phone, feeling a mix of emotions. Part of me wanted to warn her, to tell her not to ever expect much.
But another part of me debated whether to give Ben a heads-up as it seemed like this was a serious issue for his new girlfriend and that she expected more attention to such things. Yet, a part of me resented having to teach him to be better about something he never tried with me.
I also felt like it wasn’t my place to interfere. After a moment, I typed back, “Honestly, he’s my ex for a reason. I can’t say if he’ll change or not, and I’m not going to have the answers you need.” I continued, “It’s something you’ll have to figure out together. Lovely meeting you, though.”
Months went by without much thought about that night. Then, one evening, Ben called me out of the blue. “Lisa and I broke up,” he said, sounding frustrated.
“What happened?” I asked, genuinely curious.
“She kept making a big deal out of nothing, busy complaining about birthdays and anniversaries. I told her it’s not something I care about, and she just wouldn’t let it go,” he said, sounding furious.
“It turned into this huge argument when I forgot our anniversary, and she left,” he explained, his voice tinged with annoyance.
I sighed, feeling a twinge of guilt as I wondered if I could’ve helped them if I had been more supportive of Lisa when she texted me. “Ben, did she tell you it was important to her?” I asked, feeling like my responses to Lisa played a part in their breakup.
He was silent for a moment. “She told me on many occasions that such things were important to her.”
“But WHO CARES! You never made it a big deal,” he said defensively.
Tired of coddling him, I said, “Well, sir, and that’s why we divorced.”
“That’s mean, Kim,” my ex replied, sounding sad.
“Look, I’m sorry, but I stopped trying because I knew it wouldn’t matter to you,” I replied calmly. “But that doesn’t mean it wasn’t important to me. Or to her. You have to meet people halfway.”
Ben grumbled something under his breath, and I could tell he wasn’t ready to accept that truth. We ended the call on a neutral note, and I sat there, thinking about Lisa. She deserved someone who would appreciate her efforts and reciprocate her feelings.
A few days later, I bumped into Lisa at the grocery store. She looked tired but managed a smile when she saw me. “Hi, how are you?” she asked politely.
“I’m good, thanks. How about you?” I replied, genuinely concerned.
“I’ve been better,” she admitted. “Ben and I broke up.”
“I heard,” I said softly. “I’m sorry it didn’t work out.”
She sighed. “I couldn’t deal with feeling unimportant. I tried to explain it to him, but he didn’t seem to care.”
I nodded, understanding her frustration all too well. “It’s hard when someone doesn’t value what you do. You deserve someone who will.”
Lisa smiled sadly. “Thanks. I appreciate that. I guess I hoped he could change.”
“Change is hard for some people,” I said gently. “But don’t lose hope. You’ll find someone who values you.”
We parted ways, and I felt a strange sense of closure. Lisa’s struggle mirrored my past frustrations, but it also highlighted how much I had grown since my marriage ended. I had learned to accept Ben’s flaws, but I also realized that I deserved more than what he was willing to give.
That evening, I sat down with my children and talked about their dad. I wanted them to understand that while he had his shortcomings, he loved them deeply. We laughed about his forgetfulness and shared stories of the good times we had as a family.
As I reflected on everything, I felt a deep sense of peace. I had moved on from the hurt and disappointment and was ready to embrace whatever the future held. I hoped Lisa would find the happiness she deserved, and I knew that I had done the right thing by not getting too involved in their relationship.
In the end, it wasn’t about birthdays or anniversaries. It was about finding someone who truly valued and appreciated you for who you are. I did not doubt that Lisa would find that person someday, and I knew I was finally content with my own life.
As I looked at my children, I felt grateful for the love and joy they brought into my life. We had our good and bad moments, but we were a family, and that was what mattered most. And as for Ben, I hoped he would eventually learn to value the important things in life.
For now, I was happy. I had my kids, friends, and a sense of peace I hadn’t felt in a long time. And that was more than enough.
If you enjoyed Kim’s story, you’ll love this one about a woman who got pregnant around the same time her son’s girlfriend was also expecting. The son’s girlfriend caused a rift in the family when she made demands of his mother about naming her child.
This work is inspired by real events and people, but it has been fictionalized for creative purposes. Names, characters, and details have been changed to protect privacy and enhance the narrative. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, or actual events is purely coincidental and not intended by the author.
The author and publisher make no claims to the accuracy of events or the portrayal of characters and are not liable for any misinterpretation. This story is provided “as is,” and any opinions expressed are those of the characters and do not reflect the views of the author or publisher.
People Wondered about the Purpose of These 6 Things & Got Unexpected Answers
The world is a captivating realm, teeming with enigmatic objects that never cease to astound individuals with their appearance and, of course, their elusive purposes. After all, not everything can be unraveled through a simple Google search, especially when you’re not entirely sure what you’re seeking.
Two hands holding a question mark sign | Source: Shutterstock
In our everyday lives, mysteries constantly pique our curiosity, compelling us to unravel their secrets. The internet, our boundless portal to knowledge, connects us with online communities of investigators passionate about exploring these enigmas. Through the digital realm, the pursuit of understanding has transcended physical boundaries, offering us a wealth of information and expertise at our fingertips.
A man in a white shirt scratching his head | Source: Shutterstock
Every click delves deeper into the fascinating tapestry of the world, revealing hidden stories and captivating facts. Yet, amidst these discoveries, a universal truth emerges: often, things are not as extraordinary as they first seemed to be. Here are six mystery finds that people wondered about and received unexpected answers.
6. Junk or Something More?
An original poster shared this picture online after finding what they decided to call a “scoopy doodad” in a junk drawer. Holding the mysterious item in both their hands, they turned to the virtual world for help and, of course, answers.
The Answer: According to netizens, the classic Sunbeam Mixmaster came with a juicer attachment, a bowl that could attach to the top of the mixer. The strange object happened to be the spout the juice would pour out of, with the wire part holding a small strainer to filter out the pulp.
5. An Old Cabinet Find
One user stumbled upon something in an old cabinet, which they said was made entirely of glass and had narrow holes throughout its length. Hoping to find out what it was, they shared the peculiar object’s photo online, and fortunately, many people were quick to solve the puzzle.
The Answer: The odd-looking glass object turned out to be a flower frog, used for holding a flower arrangement in a vase. The person who shared the answer said it had been made obsolete by foam and gels.
4. A Heavy Glass Object
This person turned to Reddit to share a picture of a glass object lying on a wooden table. They said it was extremely heavy, came with no markings, and bore a very narrow hole on its top. What could it be?
The Answer: The mystery of the bizarre-looking glass object was cracked by a genius netizen who used two words to solve the puzzle: Oil candle. We bet you didn’t see that one coming, or did you?
3. The Mystery Object Hiding inside a Bedroom Drawer
A Reddit user didn’t expect to find this unusual object while opening their bedside drawer. Upon closer inspection, they discovered that its bottom appeared to be made of suede or soft leather. But that was all they could manage to guess or conclude.
The Answer: Nobody could have guessed what it was until one user shared the answer and solved the mystery: It was a nail buffer. Even the original poster was shocked and said they clearly didn’t pay much attention to their nails.
2. What’s Hiding underneath the Floorboards?
Sharing the picture of a silver-colored object, somewhat resembling an antique scissor of sorts, one user couldn’t help but wonder what it could be. They said they found the bizarre thing under the floorboards in an 1800’s era home
The Answer: The mystery of the puzzling item was cracked by one netizen, who shared it was used to remove the top of soft-boiled eggs. Another user quickly confirmed that the answer was correct.
1. A Baffling Hotel Room Find
A guest staying in a hotel room was baffled when they stumbled upon a vertical slot inside their bedside table. They couldn’t help but wonder what it was used for, and when they struggled to find the answer, they decided to ask the online community for help.
The Answer: It turned out that the slot was used for storing a laptop or tablet while charging them overnight, so they didn’t occupy too much room on the entire nightstand. The user who shared the answer said they asked about it at their hotel’s front desk. They also pointed out that the hotel seemed familiar to the one they booked in Philly, and OP was quick to respond in the affirmative.
Leave a Reply