A woman goes to her boyfriend’s parents’ house for dinner. This is tobe her first time meeting the family and she is very nervous. They all sit down and begin eating a fine meal.
The woman is beginning to feel a little discomfort, thanks to her nervousness and the broccoli casserole. The gas pains are almost making her eyes water. Left with no other choice, she decides to relieve herself a bit and lets out a dainty fart.
It wasn’t loud, but everyone at the table heard thepouf. Before she even had a chanceto be embarrassed, her boyfriend’s father looked over at the dog that had been snoozing at the woman’s feet and said in a rather stern voice, “Skippy!”. The woman thought, “This is great!” and a big smile came across her face. A couple of minutes later, she was beginning to feel the pain again.
This time, she didn’t even hesitate. She let a much louder and longer fart rip. The father again looked and the dog and yelled, “Dammit Skippy!” Once again the woman smiled and thought “Yes!”. A few minutes laterthe woman had to let another one rip.
This time she didn’t even think about it. She let rip a fart that rivaled a train whistle blowing! Once again, the father looked at the dog with disgust and yelled, ”Dammit Skippy, get away from her before she shits on you!”
My Dad Replaced My Mom with My Best Friend – I Made Him Taste His Own Medicine
When Hannah’s Dad waltzed into her birthday party with her best friend on his arm, she was determined to make him pay. Little did he know Hannah’s plan would unexpectedly turn the tables at her graduation party.
“Happy birthday, kiddo,” Dad said, but his words barely registered.
The room was full of balloons and banners, but everything started feeling suddenly wrong.
“What’s the fuss?” he asked, noticing people staring.
I couldn’t believe it was happening. Dad had walked into my 25th birthday party with my best friend, Jessica, as his plus one.
“What is Jess doing with you?” I asked as soon as I recovered from the shock.
“What do you mean?” he chuckled. “We’re together, in love!”
“Are you serious? Mom is here, and everyone is watching us!”
He shrugged. “So what? I don’t care what she or anyone else feels; it’s her problem. This is MY LIFE. I want to have fun.”
I glanced at Mom, standing alone with tears streaming down her face. She just turned and went inside, and I couldn’t stand that.
“If I knew you would do something like this, I would’ve never invited you!” I snapped, turning to Dad. “And you, Jess, how could you do this? You were my best friend!”
“I’m sorry, Hannah. But it sounds like a YOU problem if you can’t accept this.”
I was shocked.
“Leave!” I said. “Just get out! Both of you!”
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