Dear Wife,
I’m writing you this letter to tell you that I’m leaving you for good. I’ve been a good man to you in our 7 years of marriage & I have nothing to show for it.
These last 2 weeks have been tough for me. Your boss notified me that you quit your job today & that was just too much to bear any longer.
Last week, you came home & didn’t even notice I had a new haircut, had cooked your favorite meal & even wore a brand new pair of silk boxers.
You ate in 2 minutes, & went straight to sleep after watching all of your soaps. You don’t tell me you love me anymore; you don’t want sex or anything that connects us as husband & wife.
Either you’re cheating on me or you don’t love me anymore; whatever the case, It’s over and I am leaving.
Your EX-Husband
P.S. don’t try to find me. Your SISTER & I are moving away to West Virginia together! Have a great life!
Dear Ex-Husband,
Believe me, nothing has made my day more than receiving your letter. It’s definitely true that you & I have been married for the past 7 years, although a good man is a far cry from what you’ve been.
I watch my TV shows so much because they drown out your constant whining & griping, although that doesn’t seem to work.
I definitely noticed your haircut last week, but the 1st thing that came to mind was ‘You look just like a girl!’ And since my mother raised me not to say anything if you can’t say something nice, I decided not to comment.
And when you cooked my favorite meal, you must have gotten me confused with MY SISTER, because I stopped eating pork 7 long years ago.
About those new silk boxers: I turned away from you because the $49.99 price tag was still on them, & I prayed it was a coincidence that my sister had just borrowed $50 from me that morning.
After all of this, I still loved you & felt we could make this work. So when I hit the lotto for 10 million dollars, I quit my job & bought us 2 tickets to Jamaica. But when I got home you were gone.
Everything happens for a reason, I guess. I hope you have the fulfilling life you always wanted. My lawyer said that the letter you wrote ensures you won’t get a dime from me. So take care.
Signed, Your Ex-Wife, Rich As Hell & Free!
P.S. I don’t know if I ever told you this, but my sister Carla was born Carl. I hope that’s not a problem!
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Jimmy Carter’s eldest grandchild shares health update as former president nears 16 months in hospice
It’s been 479 days since Jimmy Carter entered hospice care at his home in Plains, Georgia.
Although the former president’s family initially believed he would only live a few days, Carter, at 99 years old, has defied the odds.
“God had other plans,” Jason Carter, 48, said.
Jason, the oldest of the Jimmy and Rosalynn’s 22 grandchildren, recently shared an update with Southern Living on the health of the 39th president.
According to the oldest grandchild, there’s “really been no change” in the last few months.
After nearly 16 months under hospice care, the last seven without his wife of 77 years, Carter is “experiencing the world as best he can as he continues through this process.”
“After 77 years of marriage… I just think none of us really understand what it’s like for him right now,” Jason said.. “We have to embrace that fact, that there’s things about the spirit that you just can’t understand.”
While family continue to visit the former president at his home in Plains, they find it difficult to predict what kind of day Carter will have.
More often than not, Carter spends his days sleeping.
However, a few weeks ago Jason visited his grandfather and the two watched an Atlanta Braves game and talked about the Carter Center and their family.
“I told him, I said: ‘Pawpaw, you know, when people ask me how you’re doing I say, ‘honestly I don’t know,’” Jason remembered. “And he kind of smiled and he said ‘I don’t know, myself.’”
Jimmy Carter is in my prayers every single day. Please share to keep him and his family in yours.
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